I showed him my bush... on skype.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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