Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
There's even glitter on my cock...
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize