Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Randomize