Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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