so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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