Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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