508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
