is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I just blew my weed a kiss
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize