we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
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Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
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I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?