youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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