No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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