He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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