I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Randomize
