...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
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Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
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I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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