By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
33 Sex Crazed People That Are Going Balls Deep
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
21 Family Members Confess The Creepiest Things They Know About a Relative
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit