All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
