KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize