I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
