Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
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