Someone shit on the floor
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
