hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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