I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize