maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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