i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
