Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Randomize
