Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I love you.
Bad choice
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