So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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