you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
