Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
My nipple is on Facebook.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I don't deserve a penis
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
