babies were throwing up all over the place
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
These Are 19 of the Most Horrible Strangers People Had to Sit Next to
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I need a beard to bite.