I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
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