I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?