so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.