I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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