Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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