Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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