i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
