we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Help. Why am I so naked?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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