So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
it was like having sex with a tree stump
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
