Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize