He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
