Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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