You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
