She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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