i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
