Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
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We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
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Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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