So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
