Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
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I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
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The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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