dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize