Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize