all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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